Well, I must say I have been enjoying all of these stories immensely, and am a little sad because with less than two years in, I hardly have any stories that come even close to those already here. I have nothing that can top ‘em.
But I can share a couple of slightly quirky snapshots of last summer, when I was at Meaford for SQ/BIQ.
- First weekend, and confined to base, our pl comd decided to give us some R&R and do a trip to the "beach". Fully expecting sand and surf, I packed accordingly: pt gear and towel. Well the "beach", it turns out, was a stoney shoreline, the water was ice cold (in was still only June), and the sun never came out all day. In spite of this, several lads were sun-fooked as the UV was hitting us all day (we had to spend the ENTIRE day there, as it was "out of sight, out of mind" for the pl comd‘s boss). The lads got extremely bored, and some fun and games involving crayfish and exposed nether regions were started. Several bets were taken and several arses became meals for hungry crayfish. Instructors owed us beers, but we couldn‘t collect until the end of the course.
- I got duped REAL good by a friendly A&SHofC Sgt during the SQ FTX. After being awake for many hours, and trying to dig our trench through the night, only getting down about 18" in the hard red Meaford clay, Sgt So-and-So pops around to check on the morale (and alertness) of the troops. "Hey, I got a hammock set up back in the admin area, if you need to catch some winks, I‘m letting troops take turns". We already had our morning stand-to, and it sounded like a reasonable offer at the time, so I fell for it. "Sure, thing Sgt!" says I. "Well grab your rifle, and come on back with me," so off I go! Half way there, "Oh, you‘re gonna need your sleeping bag, you can‘t use mine". So back to the trench I go, grab the sleeping bag valise, and then double back to the admin area, all the while following the track plan. On arrival at the admin area, I‘m standing around waiting for the Sgt, and the other staff are averting their eyes and semi-stifling their giggles. Took me a while to catch on. Sgt comes back: "Oh, yeah can‘t do it today we‘re about to start the patrols and stuff, go on back to the trench"... ha ha, joke‘s on me! Now I am very wary of offers for a "hammock set up at the admin area", especially from A&SH CAN Sgts!
- A particular sect 2ic had irked our entire section, no matter what we did to try and do things right, like every new MCpl, he was always able to bring us down several notches and rub it in to boot. It became very tiresome, and so as a result, we started working to rule a bit, and taking his instructions literally. During the BIQ FTX, my fireteam partner and I were one of the security elements on a simple road/bridge ambush (we started out night recce, and got zero sleep the whole night waiting for the main force to arrive). So, MCpl Unpopular arrives and gives us instructions, telling us to take up a position over there in the tall grass and to remain standing. It was still dark, but dawn was fast approaching. At one point, one of us crouched down, but the good MCpl, in an urgent whisper, said to keep standing. Ok, if you insist! Receiving no further instructions, we were STILL standing at day break, and about 25 mins later when the EN force coasted down the road, led by our course officer. "What the *&%@ are those two troops doing standing in the middle of that field?!?!?" Of course, the "ambush" still went off, and MCpl Unpopular lost a gasket when we tried to explain that we were ordered to remain standing. But, it was the God‘s honest truth! Gotcha, Lorne Scots! Needless to say, neither me or my partner got Top Candidate!
Hope you get a chuckle out of those at least... it may take me a while to get some really high calibre "war stories" though...