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References Superthread [Merged]

scm77:  Can the dentist honestly and accurately answer all the questions on the reference form?  If so, I can see why there'd be a problem. 

furyofmojo:  I had a hard time coming up with good references as well.  Not nearly as hard a time as you're having, but I can understand where you're coming from.  Like others have said, try to come up with a friend of the family.  Does your family business deal with any other companies on a regular basis (like a sales rep that comes by every so often, for instance, or long time regular customers/clients that might be able to help out).  The recruiters really try to push professors, but I'm not sure if they're familiar with most civilian universities.  Most of my professors only knew me as a number or by my face.  They wouldn't be able to provide any reference of value.  Maybe try a principal or vice-principal at one of the schools you attended.  Even if they're not willing to just sit down and write it up, they can take a look at your file and grades and whatever else and probably come up with something.  As long as you weren't a trouble-maker, they might be comfortable with that. 
 
hoser rd said:
scm77:   Can the dentist honestly and accurately answer all the questions on the reference form?   If so, I can see why there'd be a problem.

Depends what questions are on the form.   He can answer questions about my character, if I was responsible and did the things he told me to, if I showed up on time.   I should mention he was an orthodontist so he told me all kinds of crap to do with my braces etc.   He could say how I did everything I was told to.

Do you know what's on the reference form?
 
Not off the top of my head.  I handed in my application a number of months ago, so its not fresh in my mind.  I think I recall seeing them posted on the web somewhere, but I'm not sure.

It sounds like it might be ok, but I'm far from a recruiter.  Maybe Koach can shed some light on this?
 
My recruter told me it could be anyone thats known you for five years or more.......I havent submitted mine yet, but I just got two long term friends to fill my forms out, is that a bad thing?
 
Iwannabeasoldier said:
My recruter told me it could be anyone thats known you for five years or more.......

That's strange, the DND Recruiting site says you need a total of five years coverage between your refrences. ???
 
The best bet is to call a recruiting centre.  The one I work at now requires at least one of your references to have known you for at least five years.  You can no longer add them up for five years.  These letters are a character reference only, if you read the hand out that comes with them, it says that they must be an adult who is not related to you.  They can be employment, educational or personal references, your friends or neighbors can be your references.
 
I agree with Tracker, I had my references all ready and dropped off the completed application and my recruiter told me that one of my references had to be someone I knew for at least five years (both I had were not) so I took one off and used a childhood friend and he didn't say anything to me about not being able to use a friend...hope that helps!
 
If you are in University, then you will be running into the same Professors throughout your Degree courses.  You will land up doing Tutorials with some of them and they should then get to know you personally, and you will not be just a number.  In that case, ask one of them to be a Reference for you.  Ideally five years would be required, but there are exceptions.  Children of Armed Forces parents have often  moved every four to six years, so they also have a similar problem.  They use References of friends that they have met in the past and may still have contact with.  There is nothing saying that your References must be in the same town as you.  They could reside anywhere. 

It shouldn't cause you too much consternation.

GW
 
Do references have to see you often for that period of 5 years?
I have family friends that have known me since I was born, but would only see me once every month (or every 3 months)

And would a teacher (who I've only been with for 10 months) be a good reference?
(specially my chef/teacher, he has lots of information about my reliability and endurance to stress, etc)

And... would a cousin's wife count as a relative?

Other than that, I don't know anybody that knows me well and that has seen me often for 5 straight years.
 
George Wallace said:
If you are in University, then you will be running into the same Professors throughout your Degree courses.  You will land up doing Tutorials with some of them and they should then get to know you personally, and you will not be just a number.  In that case, ask one of them to be a Reference for you.  Ideally five years would be required, but there are exceptions.  Children of Armed Forces parents have often  moved every four to six years, so they also have a similar problem.  They use References of friends that they have met in the past and may still have contact with.  There is nothing saying that your References must be in the same town as you.  They could reside anywhere. 

It shouldn't cause you too much consternation.

GW

Not in my case.  Maybe thats why the recruiters seemed like it was an absolutely ludicrous thing for me to say that a professor was not possible for a reference.  Because it probably varies from school to school, and maybe mine was the exception or whatever.

Throughout my academic career, I only had one professor off the top of my head who was a repeat instructor, and that was only for what amounted to one course split into to two and spread out over the whole year.  With the 120+ students in the class, he might've recognized me, but he'd have no idea who I was.  Part of that was the fact that I didn't spend every day camped outside his office for office hours (like some students did), but I did probably an average amount of communication with him.  In extreme cases one might get to know a single professor (a friend of mine did a special project as a course, so obviously he got in), but at my school that was way outside the norm.

I'd also point out that the lack of repeat professors wasn't for lack of trying.  I had a number of professors that I wish I could've gotten again, where it just wasn't feasible.  Either they weren't teaching their regular course some time later, or the time they taught it conflicted, or anything.  Even still, I wouldn't trust any of them to write me a reference, or I'd be certain to screen the references quite well.  Even the senior design project courses I took, where we were spending 6 hours minimum a week in a lab and the lab TA's were there at least half the time, they'd still make a lousy reference.
 
Hi, I'm new to the board so please forgive me if this isn't the correct place to post this.

I saw a thread about references so this seemed like a good place to post it without starting a whole new thread.

Well, like the first poster in this thread I havn't really got any references except my parents long-terms friends who knew me when I was in my moms tummy :P I was wondering if it would be acceptable if I used both the wife and husband or would that not go over well? Should I just use one and try to find another reference?
 
RebornXmetalhead said:
Do references have to see you often for that period of 5 years?
I have family friends that have known me since I was born, but would only see me once every month (or every 3 months)

And would a teacher (who I've only been with for 10 months) be a good reference?
(specially my chef/teacher, he has lots of information about my reliability and endurance to stress, etc)

And... would a cousin's wife count as a relative?

Other than that, I don't know anybody that knows me well and that has seen me often for 5 straight years.

Basicly they just ask how long have you known Joe Blow?
Family friends count,relitives don't.

Hope this helps.
 
Guys....you're making it sound like you have to live with your References for five years.  None of us could do that.  I used a friend of the family, who was a neighbour across the street from my parents, who I saw at Chistmas and New Years annually and little else.  They knew me and my family and that was enough.  Remember, you are not going for the top job in the Canadian Forces; you are just trying to join at the bottom rung.  If you used someone who you lived with for five years and were now trying to use them as a Reference, that would mean that they would probably be "THE EX"  and I doubt you'd get a glowing reference then.

GW
 
I thought my earlier post was clear enough.  Don't complicate this more than it has to be.  Friends are ok, family is not ok, at least one has to have known you for five years, less is unacceptable.  All they have to be able to do is say "Johnny/Jane is a good boy/girl." 
 
Thank you for all the responses.

I guess I'll just use my long time friends for references and hope my application isn't scrutinized too much.
 
I'm stumped over the letters of Reffrence thing.
Besides family I don't know anyone for 5 years anymore..I just lost a good old friend to Liver Cancer a few months back.

I'm very picky about my friends, and to make matters worse we just moved to the small town we are in, and have only been here a year.

Can't family give a letter of refrence if he was ex military, and is a Father in law...hell I almost had to do his own basic training just to marry his daughter. ;D

Just trying to get all my ducks lined up before I visit the recruting office.
Trying to find my grades is another nighmare...ack!

Cheers!
P.
 
You'll have a bit of a hard time, but you can do it. Firstly, even if a family member is ex-military they can't be a reference because they are considered to be biased, even they are your Father in Law. As far as I know though if don't have anyone who has know you for five years, you have to get a bunch of people to write you letters to cover five years and as far as I remember they must have know you for at least a year, I'm not sure on this so it's best to confirm this with your recruiting center. They'll do there best to give you a chance to get into the armed forces.
 
I can sympathize, 5 years is an insane amount of time to know anyone. I was lucky that I purely by chance ran into an old friend who I knew for about 6 years since the end of elementary school, and got an old high school teacher to write the other, which was quite awkward I may add, since I never talked to any of my teachers outside of class.

All I can say is explain your situation to a recruiter and pray for sympathy, and dont give up.
 
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