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Gag Bos'n Pipes

And when your MSOD you really want to crucify the people that are having fun with your Bosun mate.
 
We got this one piped a few years back - Dockyard work Heywood Jablome, bridge. 

The poor guy was a french OS who had a heavy accent.  Blended the two names together perfectly. 

I always loved with the pipes were made because there was a collective chuckly throughout the ship as you waited for the buffer to lose his mind...haha.
 
A good friend of mine when we were OD's called the Bos'n mate who he knew very well and asked him to pipe..."Civilian worker Red Cox...Sickbay"  He then had him correct it with..."Belay last all Civilian workers working with Red Cox...Sickbay."  The whole ships company grew that grin and the Cox'n, Buffer and XO all flew to the Flight deck to fill the poor guy in.  I will never forget it.

Wicked Thread by the way  :salute:

I feel sorry for the new guys in the Bos'n shack after a few of us on here read this.

Oh and we actually had a MS Forgarty so that pipe got old quick.

:cdn:

Cheers

N_B
 
  Along the same line, how about those pipes telling you to go to spaces for no reason at all, or animals sounds, or "Pipe PO Bloggins to the CSE office right meow."
That last one isn't all that funny. However when it is one of those busy days and things start to get foolish it can crack you up.
 
aussiechangover said:
ok manged to remember another

sonar reporting to control... con, sonar new contact bearing 365 classified merchant via in out ball slap and shaft rub...roger sonar

it's amazing what they were doing to the OOW when you were listening in on sonar IC. glad i was tucked away in the commcen

Bearing 365, eh?
 
N. McKay said:
Bearing 365, eh?

yep had to get the OOW to join the greater circle club. the sonar guys had to judge how tired the OOW was before throwing this one in although nothing like here the OOW tell sonar to STFU if he was switched on.
 
I pulled this one the other day and got a good chuckle. 

Civilian Worker Barry Pye to the galley.


:D
 
HFXCrow said:
Yak, your inability to pay attention to detail and concentrate makes you a prime candidate to make these pipes.

A busy, bewildered Bosnmate is a perfect target.

Have you ever heard a stoker making pipes?  We're the definition of "bewildered bosnmate".
 
Dockyard worker Gerry Atric, Chief and POs
Dockyard worker Coat, Hanger
 
aussiechangover said:
ok manged to remember another

sonar reporting to control... con, sonar new contact bearing 365 classified merchant via in out ball slap and shaft rub...roger sonar

was that on a sub? I heard the same thing on a ship I was loaned to [HMAS Darwin], and all of us Ew's wondered how a sonar contact could bear 365 [out of a possible 360].

 
whiskey601 said:
was that on a sub? I heard the same thing on a ship I was loaned to [HMAS Darwin], and all of us Ew's wondered how a sonar contact could bear 365 [out of a possible 360].

yep it was on a sub, the sonar guys used to do it see if the OOW was paying attention
 
HFXCrow said:
OS Pratt & OS Whitney- Engine Room
Civilian Worker- Angus McDonald Bridge
Civilian Worker -Jeffery Dalmer Fridge Flats
OS Coat-Hangar
CO's Deck out of Bounds Stripper Being Laid On Deck

or the Resident Shipboard Roid Monster Muscle Head...LS Bloggins Small Arms Locker

or the resident retard...PO2 Bloggins required CDF (Common Dog ****) Locker

Poor Bloggins. I heard there was an actual Bloggins on the DIN.

I know pratt!
 
My first watch as bosun mate was on HMCS Chaudiere in 69' and I was asked to pipe, Dockyard Rigger Mortis to the brow, which I promptly did much to my chagrin.  I was also asked to go to the Buffer and ask for a gallon of relative bearing oil.  OD's are pretty wet behind the ear.
 
Every once in awhile, a bos'n mate with a heavy french accent will make a classic. I wasn't there for this one but it's a classic weather warning,
'Cox'n is to be exercised on the Focsle, heavy spray' ;D
 
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