4Feathers said:Good for you! What a very idealistic view of being a military wife (spouse). I hope your sacrifices are worth it, but in reality, when retirement is inevitable, it's your family that will hopefully call on you from time to time, not the military. Most military families end up making sacrifices for their childrens education, family health reasons etc. It is part of the sacrifices we make as CF members, not just the deployments. In my experience, being proud to serve has to be balanced with making the right decisions for family, whether that's children, parents or spouses. There is no "job description" as a military spouse from what I can find, so I try to not judge others decisions on what is best for their own families. Society and military has changed a lot in the last 30 years, and the military promotes a well balanced military/family life (at least where I am).
My post was in response to a now dead issue! Thank you again Armyvern for filling in the gaps.
My point was the "wife" would obviously know there are some expectations when you marry a military member, period. No judgment there!! I completely get that everyone will do what they deem right for their circumstances. Personally I'd be thrilled if I could have a manual and job description on how to be a military spouse and fit in because the promotion of a well balanced life isn't my current reality!
My sacrifices?? I am staying here for a year so my kid can finish high school, I am then leaving an area where I have lived my whole entire life and leaving a home I have lived in since my children were babies, chances are really good I am also leaving one or both of them behind. I am moving away from my parents and my grandparents and they are losing me and my assistance. I am leaving just about everything I KNOW! When I made the choice to say yes to marrying a military man, I knew transfers would likely follow and so would these tough decisions and/or sacrifices.
Knowing he had to move and knowing I would follow, I found a way to keep my job. Silly me thought that was the right thing to do. It's not idealistic?!?! It's realistic, I still have 25 years before I reach that magic age of 67......
So tell me, what's the better decision, refuse to move?? Come up with something else where I don't perceive we are taking advantage of the current system and won't go broke in the process? WE aren't in a financial situation where sustaining two households is a reasonable solution. Nor would I want to live apart from my soon to be husband for what could be 9 years. That is MY reality. I know :crybaby: :crybaby: :crybaby:
I will repeat again, I am very new to this, I am a civilian thru and thru and I have often said these are only MY opinions and I see things totally different than most of you. I do not know this system, at all! And what I have been exposed to has been a very frustrating experience to say the least.
When this whole topic came up, my issue was and still is things are being changed after the fact when no one can do anything about it. I still think it's not right to penalize people doing IR, or whatever other terminology you want to throw in there, properly when there are people abusing it, period and I still am of the opinion, there were other areas they could have looked at for budget cuts that wouldn't tick people off so much. As for the food thing, I don't have a problem with that either, I do have a problem when that cost for one is going to be more than I spend now for four.
None of the above is aimed at anyone posting in this thread!
**anyways, that was a totally different tangent and not meant to sway this thread, but maybe if you can have a little understanding of this NEWBIE position, you'll tolerate my bonehead comments a little and not take them completely out of context**
I look forward to seeing more clarification in the upcoming communications and would appreciate it if someone could post those as they become available.