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You Know You Are Or Were An Aircraft Mechanic If

observor 69

Army.ca Veteran
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You’ve ever said, “Yea, it’s supposed to look like that.”
You’ve ever breathed 100% Oxygen to cure a hangover.
You know what JP-4 or JP-5 tastes like.
You’ve ever used a piece of safety wire as a toothpick.
You can’t figure out why maintenance officers exist.
You consider “Moly-B” smudges on food an “acquired taste.”
You have ever jumped inside an intake to get out of the rain.
You looked for pictures of “your” jet in aviation books and magazines.
You ever used a wheel chock or tow bar for a pillow.
You ever stood on wheel chocks to keep your feet dry.
You ever used a pair of dikes to trim a fingernail.
You ever wiped leaks away right before a crew showed up.
You ever had to defuel your jet an hour after fueling it.
You know the international sign language for “pull your head out of your ass.”
You believe the aircraft has a soul. You talk to the aircraft.
You know more about your mechanic buddies than you do about your own family, everyone you know has some kind of nickname.

You’ve wanted the jet to start just so you can warm up.
You have ever bled hydraulic fluid into a Gatorade bottle or soda can because it was too hard to get a hydraulic bucket.
You used the “Pull Chocks” hand signal to tell your buddies it is time to leave.
You ever pre-flighted in bad weather only to learn that the flight was canceled hours ago.
You know in your heart that your jet is female.
You refer to ANY machine as "she."
You’ve ever been told to go get some prop wash, a yard of flight line or the keys to the jet.
You fix $30 million jets, but can’t figure out what’s wrong with your $150 lawnmower.
Your toolbox at home has wheels and foam cutouts, just like the ones at work.
Some of the tools in your toolbox me have names etched on them.
 
Holy Moly..done more of those than I really care to admit..!!! :nod:  Thanx for the fun read BG.!!!! 
 
You use the phrase "No fault found, ground checked serviceable" when looking after your kid's bikes
 
CDN Aviator said:
You use the phrase "No fault found, ground checked serviceable" when looking after your kid's bikes

+1

Hahaha, very nice.

I like these, more than I'd like to admit are true, and the ones that aren't, are only because I'm fixed-wing, not jets, hahaha!
 
You've been know to mumble in your sleep "Greasy side down, greasy side down"

Oh wait,  that's for pilots.

 
CDN Aviator said:
Wings on a jet are fixed ya know........
Not all:
F14BankingAgainstMountains.jpg

GreyF14FastPass10oClock.jpg

Tornado.jpg

panavia-tornado-f3-fighter.jpg

mig23_004.jpg

fmig23_p_09_l.jpg

"Variable Geometry?"
 
Technoviking,

Fixed Wing is used to describe all normal aircraft

Rotary Wing is used to describe the other kind of aircraft (helicopter)
 
SupersonicMax said:
Technoviking,

Fixed Wing is used to describe all normal aircraft

Rotary Wing is used to describe the other kind of aircraft (helicopter)

Bwahahahaha @ "normal aircraft".... 

So Max, are you of the mindset that helicopters are so ugly that to fly, the earth just repels them?  ;D

It's ok, I work on a flying dumptruck, so I can't really make fun of anything. 
 
Hey Max,
If you can't hover you're _______ (insert unsavoury comment), there's absolutely nothing wrong with half a million parts flying around in 'loose formation'.

WrenchBender (20+ years, a helo guy)
 
WrenchBender said:
Hey Max,
If you can't hover you're _______ (insert unsavoury comment),

If you fly a fixed-wing aircraft at 90kts into a 90 kts headwind.........what do you get ?
 
CDN Aviator said:
If you fly a fixed-wing aircraft at 90kts into a 90 kts headwind.........what do you get ?
Yeah, but we don't have the Otters (CC-123) anymore :P

WrenchBender
 
Sparkplugs said:
It's ok, I work on a flying dumptruck, so I can't really make fun of anything.
Au contraire. An aircraft fleet with a noteworthy history from actual operations is much more prestigious than defending the outer markers at Bagotville or Cold Lake....no matter how many times you've watched Top Gun.    :nod: 
 
Journeyman said:
Au contraire. An aircraft fleet with a noteworthy history from actual operations is much more prestigious than defending the outer markers at Bagotville or Cold Lake....no matter how many times you've watched Top Gun.    :nod:

I guess Iraq 1 and Kosovo didn't happen then!
 
Staying current in today's jet aircraft is a challenging task.
We have lost a number of fine people while keeping their skills ready to serve when called.
Many of us remember them.
 
SupersonicMax said:
I guess Iraq 1 and Kosovo didn't happen then!

While you are quite correct. You have to admit the Herc's track record is much more extensive than that of the plastic f** jet's.
 
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