• Thanks for stopping by. Logging in to a registered account will remove all generic ads. Please reach out with any questions or concerns.

The Manly Thread

Men are happier

Your last name stays put.

The garage is all yours.

Wedding plans take care of themselves.

Chocolate is just another snack.

You can be President.

You can never be pregnant.

You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.

You can wear NO shirt to a water park.

Car mechanics tell you the truth.

The world is your urinal.

You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is "just too icky".

You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

Same work, more pay.

Wrinkles add character.

People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.

New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

You know stuff about tanks.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

You can open all yo ur own jars.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $8.95 (or less) for a three-pack.

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

You almost never have strap problems in public.

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

Everything on your face stays its original color.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life.

One wallet and one pair of shoes - one color for all seasons.

You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.

You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.

You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
 
I like Carlsberg...


http://www.simplyzesty.com/advertising-and-marketing/carlsberg-pull-brilliant-guerrilla-marketing-stunt-in-cinema/
 
Got a suit and picked up a 12 pack of Creemore Lager.  It's gonna be a rough few days.  Girlfriends father passed away yesterday.  Rest in peace Dave.  :salute:
 
Was at a client site today and went to throw out a coffee cup in the garbage but was faced with a complex warren of recycling/composting sumps. I was actually bewildered for a split second until I reminded myself that I didn't squat to pee, then just chucked it in the nearest hole in an effortless, guilt free fashion.
 
daftandbarmy said:
Was at a client site today and went to throw out a coffee cup in the garbage but was faced with a complex warren of recycling/composting sumps. I was actually bewildered for a split second until I reminded myself that I didn't squat to pee, then just chucked it in the nearest hole in an effortless, guilt free fashion.

Welcome to BC...

MM
 
I made the mistake of not getting my "wisdom teeth" out when they were supposed to come out. (~10 years ago).

So the first one came out yesterday.....local anaesthesia....(because my insurance sucks, and I'm cheap as frig)..cut the tooth in bits, and yank 'er out bit by bit.

SUCKED in all sorts of ways....

Eschewed the pills & painkillers.

WORD TO THE WISE: If you think you're "hardcore", and only need a shot of whiskey, and "gumption" as a painkiller...you are sorely mistaken.

My manly deed for the day was showing my little girl the weeping, smelly "tooth-hole".....where once resided a tooth.

She brushed like it would stop an atomic bomb....

I live as a lesson to others.

Brush yer teeth, kids.


 
I agreed with a woman's point of view:

http://fullcomment.nationalpost.com/2011/11/04/christie-blatchford-weeping-women-just-as-capable-of-evil-as-men/

... and today I did not cry, again  ;D
 
DISCLAIMER: I DON’T KNOW IF THIS IS ALL THAT MANLY...BUT IT’S FUNNY,

(and I’m not starting a “fail on Nov. 11th” thread for one story).

So....It was raining like a MF on the 11th, so I decided I wouldn't drag my kid to the Ceremonies, as we live by 12 Wing, and it’s always packed to begin with.

KARMA CHECK!!!!

I got called into work, (the boss knew I wouldn’t get the phone before 11:11 hrs, so he called @ 1130hrs.)
Went to work, did my science stuff, tried to go back home.


FLASHFLOOD!

So, I drove up on that bitch, my OODA loop kicked in, and I rolled thru/around the flood in my Corolla......others weren't so lucky.
So, I look in my rearview...and what do I see?

TWO OLD PEOPLE TRIED TO DRIVE RIGHT THROUGH THE MIDDLE OF IT!

So, it's about 12 degrees celcius, and I'm in shorts and flip-flops.....
AWESOME....

I get to high ground, stop my car, and roll out to these people.
(luckily, some other random dude had the same idea.)

We Get to thier car....water's knee deep....(and I'm 6' 3"...so knee deep is KNEE DEEP)
AND COLD.

Push the car to high ground.
What happens now?
Another car drives right in....and stalls.
So this random dude and I sigh.....and push that one out.

Then...THREE (3) MORE CARS AFTER THAT!!!!

People saw this Dude and I pushing cars out of the flood......AND THEN JUST KEPT ON COMING!!! ???

WTF...OVER?

So we push car after car out of the flood....then I realize the sewage treatment plant is 500 meters up the road.....uphill....eewwww!

I finally got home to the shower, and I have never scrubbed so hard in my life....

I figure that's my payback for not getting to the Cenotaph on time.

(Sorry  Grandpa, I'll get there next year!)

 
Can't say I rescued anyone from flash floods, but I did tear down an old outhouse at my dad's place with a crowbar, my hands and a few kicks.  Tomorrow, we tear up a deck and get rid of it  ;D.

MM
 
Manly?

I'm working on the carriage for my 1.25" bore blackpowder cannon tonight....
 
NavyShooter said:
I'm working on the carriage for my 1.25" bore blackpowder cannon tonight....

I'll call dibs on bringing "finger sandwiches" to his funeral!!!

(Just sayin')
 
Jim Seggie said:
What I drove today in the Santa Clause parade.

That could've been on a Fucking "Yugo"....what matters is the message.

Thanks, Mr. Seggie, and thanks to all of you Men & Women that have "sacked up", and answered the call.

:salute:

HS
 
Maybe I am doing something MANLY today...


I've been transcibing the ONLY account that my Grandfather ever gave about his experience in WWII.
Not real pretty...but It's nice to know he told someone about the warts before he passed.

[size=10pt](Funny enough, it's hard to get through more than a sentence or two before my monitor gets cloudy......probably should go to BESTBUY tomorrow).....[/size]
 
Back
Top