Problems with Joining

[Rsparks]

Hi, I don't mean to sound like a whiner here or anything, but for a long time now it has been my dream to join and fight with the Canadian Forces. Sadly, I have two problems that's delaying me from applying to join online and I'm not really sure what to do about either of them, so I was hoping somebody here could help me out and give me some advice. I know that joining means I will have to sacrifice a lot, but I feel that the Military has a lot to offer a guy like me and that if I pursue this that it could be one of the most difficult and rewarding experiences of my life.

My first, and probably my toughest problem, is that I am currently seeing one of the most beautiful girl's I've ever seen in my life. I've been dating her since August 8th and I just know that this is the girl I will spend the rest of my life with. My problem is that she does not want me to go and join the Canadian Forces. It's not that she doesn't approve of the Military or anything, but more so that the idea of not being able to see me very often doesn't sit well with her and that there is a chance that I could get harmed or even killed if I follow this career path. I have not really tried talking to her about it because I am afraid that she will be against it and that it might deter me from wanting to join. So, what should I do? Should I sacrifice my relationship with this girl I love for the career I think I may love? I can't help but think that if I go ahead and do this that it might ruin my relationship with this girl and that I will spend the rest of my life regretting it. At the same time; however, I feel that if I don't give this a shot I will spend the rest of my life thinking about how I should've went through with it.

My second, and much more simpler problem, is that I am not very strong physically in my upper body and am afraid that I might not be able to do the 19 push ups. Currently, I can do about 10 military style push ups(I looked at the model on the Actual CF website) before I no longer have the strength to go on. I know it's bad and I have started exercising and doing weight lifting(Have been for almost a month now) but I am worried that I will fail and be rejected because of my lack of strength in my upper body. I guess what I am looking for is insight on whether or not I'll be able to make a big enough change before I get shipped out for BMQ.

I'd really appreciate any help anyone has to offer me on this. I think that joining could end up being on of the best decision's I've ever made and that it could really change my life for the better.

 

[jmbest]

Others who have been around a lot longer will surely weigh in and advise you on your questions. I'm applying in the near future but just wanted to say that in regards to the push ups:  if *I* can do 19 push ups you definitely can. Just work at it every day..build up to it and in no time you'll pass 19 easily. I couldn't even do three when I started, but I tried to add 1-2 in every set..doing them randomly whenever I had a chance.. it's quite a small problem that you will definitely be able to overcome.

 

[PiperDown]

My first, and probably my toughest problem, is that I am currently seeing one of the most beautiful girl's I've ever seen in my life. I've been dating her since August 8th and I just know that this is the girl I will spend the rest of my life with. My problem is that she does not want me to go and join the Canadian Forces.

Here is my story.
My two best friends and I all decided in our last year of high school that we were going to join the army. (we were all heavily into army cadets etc.)
so, we went to the recruiting center together for info.
My one buddy Chris decided a few days later that he wasn't going to join after all because he didn't want to leave his GF. So, the three amigos became 2.
Mike and I went to recruit school together and when we came home for Christmas break (recruit courses over Christmas are broken into 2 parts)..  Mike's girlfriend decided that she didn't want to be with him anymore if he was going to be in the army.
So, Mike finished basic (for his pride) and then quit.
My girlfriend didn't want me to go... so, we broke up.

Today, I have 17 years in the forces and loved just about every minute.

Chris, works mall security in our home town and Mike just got laid off at the factory.
BOTH OF THEM TELL ME THAT THE BIGGEST REGRET THEY HAVE IN THEIR LIVES IS NOT GOING THROUGH  WITH THE MILITARY.
The girls of our dreams back then have come and gone.

make the decision that is right for you.

and, work on the pushups..

 

[CallOfDuty]

  Back about 5 years ago, when I was thinking of joining, I could only do about 3 push-ups.  Now I can do 45.  No biggie, just do them everyday and you'll improve.
  As for the relationship, you  will have to decide whether it is more important to keep her, or if she really doesn't want to be in a military relationship, the fact that you will probably separate.  It takes a special kind  of partner to be with a military member. 
  I have a supporting wife, who has been behind me in my career so far, but there are times when it is too much, and shes running the house and taking care of the kids all alone.  Sometimes she will say she's not sure if she wants to be a single mom for months at a time, and other times shes completely fine with it.    It's not easy. 
  Just tell her the truth, that you want to join, and she will probably only see you a handful of times over the next year+, and that when you are done training, there is a big chance you will be packing up and moving to a new part of Canada.  If shes cool with it, so be it, if not....you'll have to decide
  Take care

 

[jbonkerz]

I have been thinking of joining the Armed Forces for quite some time, however my girlfriend of 4 years said she would leave me if I were to join. I left it alone for about 6 months, however I was still thinking about joining the entire time. I finally told her that I was joining, and if she didn't like it then that is where our relationship ends. I don't want to have any regrets later in life about "what if" I had joined, like my Brother-in-Law who has wanted to be a police officer for 10 years and my sister keeps telling him no. So now I have all of my paperwork and will be bringing it in soon to get scheduled for my testing.

I guess what I am trying to say is, go for it, sign up for whatever branch of the Forces you wish. You will find someone else that is willing to accept that you are in the Forces, and they may be much better than this girl who may or may not work out.

As the saying goes "There are many fish in the sea."

 

[Bruce Monkhouse]

No one here can make this decision for you.
Locked.