kkramar said:
But a year away from my wife right at the start sounds like a lot. Any suggestions as how to deal with that?
Or is she pretty much stuck at home and never see me for a year?
I'm not going to lie to you, it's no fun and is probably the biggest problem for most people. The CF does have some things built in to help lighten the load though. Depending on when you are here you will have several leave periods (block leave) in which you use your annual leave combined with a few "freebies" (Short, Special, etc.) to get some fairly long periods of vacation. These happen in August, December and March with the longest being in December.
You are also entitled to LTA (Leave Travel Assistance or Allowance) after you have been in for 6 months. LTA doesn't reimburse you directly for the cost of going home but it does help out rather substantially. You get LTA once per year and it must be to visit your next of kin. There are almost certainly some threads on LTA and I am no expert on it so do your own research. There are not too many jobs that give you 4 weeks of paid vacation as a minimum starting day 1.
The best thing you can do is to prepare your wife for the separation. Make sure you have your financial house in order. If you don't have integrated finances with your wife, consider it.
Ask friends, family etc. back home to check in with her periodically. If you are close with some of her friends, let them know what you are up to, explain why it's going to be good for your wife (long-term financial stability etc.) and get them on board with what your family is going to be facing. When it's hard for her, they are going to be the ones she turns to when you aren't around. If you have a brother or a really close friend, ask him to drop by and help out with some of the house work that you normally do (cutting the lawn is a big one around here). Basically, if you put the systems in place to make your wife's life easier when you are gone, she will be better able to manage the year, or more, which will ultimately result in you being able to focus on your training. Most importantly, remember that while you are going off to St. Jean to do BMQ and then off in Gagetown pursuing your dreams, she's at home missing you and left to carry on.
Finally, when you have those nights where you are having a rough go, and you will, stick it out. Remember why you joined and what you want to accomplish for yourself, but more importantly, your family. The hard times on course do come but are more than overcome by the good times and are often the times most fondly remembered at the course party and with your course mates in the years to come. (41 hours on gate duty in the driving rain at near zero temps...
)
Best of luck...