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Any favourite BMQ memories?

One of my favorite memories was also one of my first, on the first night and it was hard to sleep, anyway just as I was about to fall asleep, another private, started yelling in his sleep, at the top of his lungs WHERE ARE THE COOKIES! GIMMIE THE COOKIES! We all had a good laugh at that, and for the rest of the course, his nickname was cookies.
 
This thread is my new streetcar reading. Im getting excited and worried at the same time, keep them comming!!
 
So many!

Hmm being drunk and walking pass the green desk while trying to march properly.

saluting a captain while in civies?

First day in BMQ this guy calls a Mcpl ''General Chief" and salutes him

My Mcpl throwing an artillery improv. near the shacks in Farnham but he broke a window, we almost died of a heart attack

''Good morning. This morning you will f****ng puke your guts out trust me! LET'S GO'' My Sgt would say this to us EVERY morning before PT

"Pte **** Was there a fu***g gang bang in your room? You saying you're reading for inspection?!"

During the obstacle course '' Pte ****** low profile not stripper profile!"

Gas chamber for sure.

The feeling I had during my parade. I was so damn proud of what I had accomplished.

Going to the CFLS actually, was hilarious.

Meeting great people.

Funniest inspections ever by my staff.

Horror in Farnham but we would always end up laughing to tears in our tents

and many more...

 
-me and my fire team partner doing stupid stuff to try and raise moral like telling the mcpls we're scared on our night nav cus its dark or asking them for a sip of their coffee... we get jacked up of course

-watching one of the sgt's make a fat kid scream i love cake while the rest of his section held the pushup positon

-getting issued steel toe airforce boots for our whole bmq, bad blisters.

-my fireteam partner was being inspected by a WO, my buudy thought he looked funny and laughed in his face... the warrent told him if he didnt stop laughing he would make sure he would never smile again
 
Coming off PAT/AWT and being course senior for 2 courses of Week 0 recruits. I have NEVER in my life been more proud to see a graduation parade. It's an amazing transformation that you get to watch, I think that in some ways CFLRS staff have some of the most rewarding jobs in the CF to watch recruits walk through those green doors luggage in hand, scared as anything and watch them to the point where they are so proud to pass an inspection, a drill test and that final day where they march off that parade square as graduates.... I know even from the sidelines it was amazing to watch.

Also a few things that happened in the PAT trailers that shall never be posted in a public forum :) As much as it sucked I met alot of amazing people on PAT!
 
V-sitting at the direction of my instructor in the Jewel of the Annapolis Valley after lunch one day because I decided on a second desert. Mmmmmm, Jello..... Nom nom nom.
 
Inspection:

MCPL: "Pte, are you trying to grow a moustache?"Ā 

PTE: "No Mcpl!"

MCPL: "Then shave that fucking thing off! You look like a fucking gay pornstar!..........Not that there's anything wrong with that."
 
Putting a pink razor, some sort of pink guava shaving cream, and a panda bear toothbrush in my drawer for one of the inspections half way through the course. There was no way we were going to pass the room inspection and they made such a fuss about it that they didn't notice the other mishaps in the room. I was "Rogers the Queer" for the remainder of the course... great fun!
 
I guess this will be a bit of an entertainment for people.
In my BMQ, I was standing at attention at the side of my cot for inspection.
We had a bird inside the gym we used as our quarters at the time.
I could see my sect commander approaching then the shadow of the bird flying just
over me and I heard something wet on my chest something sticky on my uniform.

I literally got crapped on by a bird, as the sect commander was approaching me.

He had a really hard time keeping straight face but he managed to yell at me for having bird crap on my uniform.
First he looked at me and tried not to laugh and turned back for a moment then came the jacking.
"You will not disgrace my uniform by having bird **** on it! You have two minutes after this inspection to go get the bird **** your **** shirt or you will be cleaning it with your mouth next time I see it!"
 
My favorite memory would have to be watching a MCpl jack up our course officer on BMQ-L. Here's the story:

We were out on a field ex in lovely old Meaford and had practiced field craft and nav all day and finally got to crawl into our hoochies to get some sleep. But then before the crack of dawn we got an arty drill. So we packed out stuff up and ran to our form up point. Well one guy on course decided his MP3 player was more important than his rifle and he left it behind. He asked if he could go back and get it and ran off into the woods. It was a cool morning so we all had our jackets on and our hoods up so it was hard to tell who was who. Our course officer was in the front rank just a bit in front of us and was around the same build and height of the guy who forgot his rifle. One MCpl came up to him and got right in his face. This is how the conversation went:

MCpl: Don't you ever forget for f***ing rifle! (and proceeded to yell and rant for a little bit)
2Lt: Um...it's me MCpl
MCpl Oh...sorry sir 0_o; But whoever that was you heard me to!Ā  :rage:


It was all we could do to keep from bursting out laughing.
 
I was getting all of my kit on before we went to the field, and my flashlight was on my shoulder harness. The 2IC came behind me and unhooked it and let it fall, I thought it was a buddy and called him a douchebag before I turned around. When I turned around and realized what I'd done I apologized to the point of begging. He told me to get a pen and paper and write out two paragraphs on the definition of 'douchebag'.
When we got to the field later that day, I had to read the definition out to the entire course and then I spent the entire night digging trenches, and carrying the dirt 30ft away in order to hide it. That was the day before we started our 'sleep deprivation' portion of the course.
Needless to say, I was hallucinating quite a bit by the end of the week.
 
A couple weeks into BMQ, formed up ready for inspection, the guy next to me sneezed while one MCpl. passed by:

Mcpl: "What the **** was that? Did you just sneeze Pte. _______?, Is that a new drill movement? One, sneeze, two, three?!"

At that moment I just couldn't hold the laughter in and all the spit that I had let build up in my mouth went projectile all over the instructor who was at that moment directly infront of me. Ive never went from laughing to damn near cowering in fear so fast in my life. Luckily he thought it was almost as funny as I did and had to try his best not to laugh aswell.

After that he always covered his face when passing by me during inspection.
 
- being told to 'f*** the shut up' by my favourite Vandoo section commander :)
- standing at 'present arms' for 45+ mins because, well, just because
- doing change parade up and down umpteen flights of stairs at the MEGA
- the food at the MEGA, yuk, still can't look at a Pogo without my gag reflex kicking in :S
- graduationĀ  :salute:
 
YOU BRING YOUR KNEE THIS HIGH OFFICER CADET !!!!! FROM THE TOP.... I'M A BARBIE GIRL IN THE BARBIE WORLD!!
(While doing drill movements, in front of the platoon... Singing the song)
 
One of the best I can remember was doing in reserve BMQ (QL2?) Back in 2000 with the G&SF out of Barrie, ON.


We were formed up on the parade square with our backs to the wall while our M/Cpl was inspecting our canteens to check they were full. For every canteen that wasn't, he would hurl it over his shoulder as hard as he could, not bothering to look who was behind him.

At the time our Armory cleaner was busy using a floor buffer cleaning the parade square. Needless to say, He hurls a mostly full canteen and manages to hit her square in the side of the head, knocking her out like a sack of potatoes. We could all see it happen, but he had his back to it. The look on his face as he slowly turned around was priceless.

She managed to get away with a few weeks off paid and a very serious concussionĀ  >:D
 
During the OC inspection:

OC- "Who is the Prime Minister of Canada?" to the recruit.
Recruit- "Steeeve?.. Sir."
 
Haha... I just remembered a really good one.. From an RCD Sergeant.. We are formed up in the Parade Square.

Sgt. "O.Cdt Bloggins, What is the role of the armoured?"

Officer Cadet. "To protect the sanctity and chastity of Infantry, Sergeant?!?"

Sgt. "By, God.. I think we have our next CLS!!."
 
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